Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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