..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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