Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
