I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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