He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize