Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
