Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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