plz talk dirty to me
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize