I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize