She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Randomize
