Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
