please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Randomize
