i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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