Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
