this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
My feet surprised me
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
