is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
