Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
