I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
