She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize