party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize