i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
My dick has a subreddit
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
