Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Holy shit dude........stairs
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
