i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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