I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize