ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
