Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i will never coherently bang her
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
