break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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