Grow some girl-balls and come out already
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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