Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Randomize
