It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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