Well douche your snatch and let's go!
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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