I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
