I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
