Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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