I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
