I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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