I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
