either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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