She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
