im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Randomize
