Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
