how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
