Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
