There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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