Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
