She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
