Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
