shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize