It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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