She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize